I have a problem. It's called anxiety. I am a worry wart! Lately, I've been walking about with Mr. Doom in my head spinning all kinds of tales. Eventually such anxiety wreaks havoc on my body . . . which then makes me think there really may be something wrong with me.
I am going to the doctor to discuss my stomach issues and see if I can get anywhere with that. However, outside of that, I can't fathom what else could be possibly physically wrong with me.
Therefore, I am praying that God be with me and help me let go and give it to Him. To not fret over every little thing. Life is serious, of course, in many ways, but much of what I worry over has not one iota of my control.
Since I'll be on Molokai one day this week, I am hoping to leave my worries with St. Damien. Perhaps Blessed Marianne Cope can lend a hand as well.
St. Joseph, ora pro nobis.
In any event, I am puttering about the house doing all the cleaning I boasted about doing earlier in the week on FB. HA! Seriously, I did get one bathroom clean and I did do the floors . . . but then I sat. And sat. And sat. I mustn't do that. I must stop working on my circumference! So far today, I was woke by my daughter (who is on her Confirmation retreat) who is not feeling great, but we are trying to get her to stick it out (after all, what is ailing her ails all women most of our lives, ahem). After we chatted and said we could come get her after the evening program (the most important of them, agreed upon w/ the teacher), I think she was able to calm down a bit. Keeping my fingers crossed at this point! Then, I managed to start the laundry (and I shall continue to do it until it's done - at least for now), clean the microwave/range, and scrub my bathroom to kingdom come. The only other task I avoided last week is cleaning the 1/2 bath downstairs. Well, that's next . . . once I cool off from having done mine.
It's keeping my mind off stuff, I'm burning calories (that's something for this chunky chick), and I'm praying while I do so.
I'm also going to take a walk once I'm done with this puttering.
Ach! There's the dryer! Time to dash off and keep going.
Addendum at 1:54pm, HI time: everything is done, except the laundry, but that is just two more small loads. I'm so pleased that I've managed this tasking! My arms are tired - all that scrubbing motion they're not used to. I've begun to read Christ, Life of our Souls by Blessed Columba Marmion as well. Time with God is time well spent!
8 comments:
Wishing you good health--and a good & fruitful retreat! You'll be in prayers.
(Have you explored whether the anxiety might be related to depression or hormonal/PMS type depression? Treatment with Sarafem for PMS has worked wonders for me)
Barb - I have thought of that and I will ask my doctor about Sarafem. Thanks for the heads up. Depression certainly runs on my mum's side of the family . . . I don't think I'm depressed in the clinical sense, but I certainly have hangups two weeks of each month. The prep before and during, hormone-wise.
So glad all went well today! Thanks be to God! Cathy
Sarah...going through the same thing...def hormonal. I have always had mild depression but two weeks out of the month, it is unbearable...really have to rely on the strength of God I tell ya!
I have weird aches and pains all over the body, too. Not sure what that's about, but it's weird. I feel full all the time, but I'm hungry . . . usually, this is during the two weeks . . . Last night was the first time I ate and didn't still feel like I was full hours later. WEIRD.
YES!! I am there with you! I don't eat that much then I feel stuffed for hours...not like me at all...then I will feel hungry then if I eat, bloated again...uggghhh!
Sounds like a very productive day. I have suffered from anxiety as well. (And I do mean suffered.) Prayers coming your way. Congrats on all that productive work!
didn't we just talk about worry the other day, friend...i am going to repeat the words that a wise woman once told me...."why is trusting God so hard? well, because we want to control it all-keep pain and suffering in its place-holding everything at arms lenght so as not to feel the deepness of our gains and losses. if we would but embrace HIM, He will lift us up. He is our every need."
praying you feel better. i think lent can wreak havoc on the body as well as the soul. you are being tested, dear one. and take walks. walks are good for clearing the head...praying to Our Lady of Mental Peace for you.
xo.
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