Unreasonable Irritable-ness

Lately, I've been on the hormonal train of "get outta my way or I'll kick your backside".  It's a wreck!  It's not working for me.  And, I fear, I may snap (and have, embarrassing as it is to admit) at people - even those I love.  Only when I've realized I'm being irrational do I check my calendar and do some calculating. 

It's definitely hormones.  Too many of them, if you ask me!  However, you do not have to ask, because I am already spilling the beans.

Little things that mildly amuse or irritate me (depending upon whom is saying/writing things to me) can set my teeth on edge.  It's particularly difficult to discern in this kind of medium the "tone" (again, with the "tone", Sarah!).  When I am being more rational (I'm never completely rational, I don't think), I take things in stride and I don't overreact.  However, the past few months, I've been more a nutter than ever over the tiniest of things.

I just want to say:  I am so sorry.  If I come across as ridiculously impatient or unusually out of sorts, I am so sorry.  I can help this behaviour; I know that I have a choice!  Some time I slip.  Please forgive me.

I have more issues on Facebook than here, of course, but some of you are my friends on FB as well.  So, you have likely read my idiocy.  I try and keep it real and honest all of the time.  I un-friended some people in a whirlwind of being upset at them . . . and it was wrong.  I should just delete what they say and move on; say a prayer.  It is not easy for me to do with these old woman surging hormones.  I cannot understand it, but that is what it is!  No wonder people make such fun of menopausal women.  I believe I am in peri-menopause (which can last what seems ages when you're in it, but which is anywhere from 5-10 years - which, at my age is lightning fast at times).  Not fast enough when I'm waking in the night drenched in sweat from an internal fire bath!  Yes, I've had done three times since last year.  

Please just be patient with this tottering old fool of a lady . . . as I come to slippery grips with my aging.   

Daybook (or rather, Nightbook)

Outside my window . . . dark, because it is night.

I am thinking . . . I am exhausted and want to go to bed, but I will await Connor returning from his first concert (Korn at Blaisdell arena) some time around ten o'clock, I reckon.

I am thankful for . . . the food we have in our 'fridge . . . even though I have to do the marketing to get it there.

From the lesson plans . . . Christian aced his first algebra test!

From the kitchen . . . I just cleaned up all the dishes and the dish washer is running.  I hope to have time tomorrow to make homemade rolls with Christian.

I am wearing . . . jeans and a Hawaii 5-O crew shirt.

I am creating . . . Well, tonight I stitched Christian's name, date of birth, and birth weight on his "baby" cross stitch (ahem).  I had to put it down so many times over the years!  I get distracted!  There's one part of this that I will make a second attempt on:  there's green "embroidery" for stems and leaves that, left off, wouldn't make a big difference, but I'll always know it's not there . . . so I will try again this week to do so.

I am reading . . . the life of Anne Catherine Emmerich.  I did stop that to read the new book out on media called "The Church and New Media" by Brandon Vogt.  I think every Church/parish should have this book if for only one reason:  to get with the times.  It really resonated with me when one of the contributing authors wrote about how much time we don't have to sit in the pew for announcements; that, few of us pay any attention to them and few of us find the printed bulletin worth reading.  Good point!  Create a website; let parishioners elect to sign up for certain emails etc..  Great ideas!  I'm going to give my copy to my chapel.


I am  hoping . . . Connor is enjoying the concert.

I am hearing . . . blessedly, very little.  It's fairly quiet.

Around the house . . . I'll clean the bathrooms tomorrow, I think.  Maybe only one.  No pressure.  I do not want to strain my back again any time soon.  However, that's no excuse to not clean them.

I am going . . . to the commissary tomorrow to get a few "needs" and right now, that thought doesn't discourage me in the least - which is surprising!

One of my favourite things . . . fresh cut strawberries . . . of which there are some in the 'fridge (Rachel cut them up and added sugar, which is fine, but I'd eat them w/out the sugar) to eat tomorrow morning.

I am praying for . . . primarily Kalona, but adding on those who need to help in the process of living with illness (whether able to be cured or just going through the process to try to be healed etc.).  I'm also praying for my children and their future vocations!

A few plans for the rest of the week . . . all I know is the weekend is full of stuff to do (and I'm not sure I'm too excited about all that).

Thought for the day:

For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen. - Douglas Adams


And a picture thought:

This is Father Daren and my children.  He came to bless our home and eat with us.  It was a blessing to get to know him better in person!  I hope that Esther, Easter, and all of us can get together again upon his next visit (which will be soon, God willing).

And another: 

The koa wood honu turtles in our stairwell, under a large window.  Each one represents one of our children and the picture is a print of the meaning of Aloha with two leis, which represent Dan and I. 

Patron Saint Meme

Mahalo, Esther, for this tag! 

The rules are as follows:

"Assuming you are a saint, and your cause has been executed, your miracles confirmed, your date on the calendar established, all that is required is to select that of which Holy Mother Church will name you Patron (ess) of.

For this meme, you must name your patronage
and then tag 5 other people who would like to play along.

Linking your answer to your nominator's post would make it easier to get your answers."

What a blessing this would be, no?  I'm pretty sure some would suggest I be the patroness of laughter/comedy/anglophiles.  Maybe that's just me thinking too highly of myself.  I reckon I'd be the patroness of distressing bowel troubles.  Yes, that's me.  A perfect fit!

Ave Maria! 

I tag:  Dawn, Jennifer, Barbara, Alexa, and Suzanne. 

I'm Trying Not to Whine

I pulled a muscle or two (or several?) in my lower back on Wednesday afternoon.  I don't remember a particular moment of ZAP! and it happened, but when I bent over to finish cleaning the toilet, I started to feel it catching.  Ach du libre!

I have never had any issues with my back, so I'm grateful for that now that I know what it is like!  I cannot lie on the floor - it's disgusting and disgustingly boring (I can't hold a book up to read, I can't watch the telly; it's just "being" and I only want that kind of being when I want that kind of being!!!!!)  So, I  go between lying on my bed where I can watch a bit of telly or read (for about twenty minute stretches) or sitting (the most painful thing to do - really!), and walking about. 

It's really rather ridiculous.  The first night, I laughed and the pain peaked before bed.  Yesterday morning it was a bit rickety, but manageable.  By the time I went to bed last night I was actually hopeful I'd wake up almost good as new, as I was feeling that much better!

Alas!  Today it is much like the "peak" moments of that first night.  I just took 1000 mg of extra strength Tylenol.  If it's like this at all tomorrow, I'm going to have Dan take me to Trippler for some big gun drugs.  I think I can take it.  The pain, that is.  I really do.  I have thus far, and, I think I can continue to.

As long as I keep my sense of humour.